These 4 veteran graduates at the Melbourne intensive course in November 2008 have a total age of 280 years and this was Dave Simpson’s 50th course! These gentlemen prove that it’s never too late to start working on improving your speech.

A McGuire Graduate, Adam, recently posted to our internal discussion list regarding one such experience. Eighteen months into the programme, he had met a lawyer in private practice. Fifteen months later, he met the same lawyer and after speaking with him for some time, the lawyer remarked;

“Last time we talked, your speech was so bad I was seriously worried [about your ability to practice]. Today, I wasn’t sure I recognised you.”

Adam has worked tirelessly at his speech since he joined the Programme two and a half years ago and is continuing to reap the rewards for his efforts.

.. it was my first ‘real’ Christmas in decades complete with a house full
of relatives including young kids, Christmas tree, outdoor lights, parties,
etc. and was quite a change to my usual holiday routine (mr. Grinch,
scrooge, bah humbug). The newness of this made it even more challenging.

.. everything mentioned in the below email proved accurate, but I didn’t
expect the intensity. it was very much like surfing a huge wave, white water
rafting, skiing a steep mogul run, sky diving, combat firefight, etc. very
difficult to focus on technique, or get in that important practice/warm-up
time … just had to go with it and do my best.

… being aware of the dynamics and complications indeed helped as did
going into the (several day) situation having done extra work to toughen my
discipline beforehand resulted in reasonably good speech. not perfect, but
much better than had I entered this challenge with complacency. Such a
challenge requires much respect for the difficulty.

One of the highlights was at the big Christmas party of my fluent speaking
buddy, George, where he finally started helping me cancel when I would first
start being sloppy rather than waiting hours or the next day to say
anything. he’s learning!!

I’m now back into my pre holiday routine of morning warm-up calls with our
little group of serious grads, practice contacts, etc. and once again feel
very confident and proud of the way I speak. Now to lose those ten pounds
from the undisciplined holiday eating and drinking .

dave

=========================================

(Sent Dec 20th, 2008. ” Happy Holidays, but watch out for turbulence …”)

I thought it would be good to remind everyone that this can be a tough time
of year for our speech. It seems to be full of many dynamics that can cause
turbulence and a trip to the swamp. Here’s a few things I spotted in my own
life as Christmas approaches:

… many more approach avoidance conflicts like what presents to buy, who to
buy for, who to invite, who’s invitations to accept, etc. Remember that
approach avoidance in one part of your life can lead to the old ‘fear of
stammering/desire to be fluent’ conflict.

… frequent social gatherings/parties which usually involves drinking
resulting many times in sloppy spontaneous, and not feeling like working on
speech the next day.

… this can be a very busy time of year cutting down on time and energy
available for practice.

… with busyness comes rushing which makes it difficult to resist time
pressure.

… with more social interactions, there’s more of a chance that certain
ones (introductions to strangers at parties, etc.) will be more difficult at
a time when we’re more vulnerable resulting in blocking and loss of
confidence.

… desire to spend vs. fear of the coming bad economic times (needing to
save).

… for people like myself who put on weight easily, it is difficult to stay
disciplined with a diet. poor discipline in one area can lead to poor
discipline in our speech. Putting on ten pounds during these holidays and
being back in the swamp is not good for the old hexagon.

 What to do? Most important for me is to just realize the above dynamics and
that this time of year is a tough challenge for my speech, and to not just
‘let it go’ because it’s holidays. Next is to make those warm up calls every
morning to drill the mentality and technique and to remind myself during the
day to show people I’m working on my speech and explain to my close friends
that this is a rough time and ask their help to let me know if they see/hear
me being sloppy.

Hope this helps, and hope you all have a great Christmas and prosperous,
happy, healthy, disciplined, New Year where you start doing more of those
things to realize your potential.

cheers,

dave

Once you’ve gained some confidence in your ability to apply good technique to produce the shot you want in golf (skill), it’s time to test. My favorite test on the driving range is to hit at least 8 out of 10 shots with each club in my bag reasonably straight, with good contact and good distance. Short irions required to land within 15 feet of the pin.  It’s a bit of pressure in that if I don’t reach the 8 out of 10, I have to hit another 10 with that club with the goal of I don’t move on to the next club, or go home, until I’ve reached this goal which means spending the entire time, and possibly hundreds of balls, with the nine iron.

When applying “testing” to stuttering / stammering, your “driving range” is your support network — friends, family, primary coach, mcgp phonelist, street and telephone contacts. The difference here is the *standard (explained below)needs to be increased to 10 out of 10 (if under time constraint, 5 out of 5 will do).  I will do a series of 10 contacts with the first goal being of getting 10 out of 10* (see below) projecting through my chest without distortion/struggle in the articulators or vocal cords. Keeping track of successful and not successful contacts lets you know what stage of overkill you’re in as follows:

Panic stage: 0 -1 out of 10

Barely manageable fear stage: less than 5 out of 10

Exciting fear stage: 5 to 9 out of 10

Fun stage: 9 to 10 out of 10

Boring stage: 10 out of 10 (but do more to be sure)

Once in the boring stage with any and every possible feared word or sound, you can use contacts to refine your skills. Try 10 contacts focusing on good eye contact, then another ten with deep and breathy tone, etc. etc.

*There are a few reasons for the tougher standards with my speech (requiring 10 out of 10) here than in golf (requiring 8 out of 10). The biggest reason, arguably, is that golf is so much more difficult, technically, than speaking which was, although complicated, a skill aquired almost unconsciously in early childhood.

If you’ve ever wondered whether the blocking behaviors associated with stuttering are present in other performance activities, this golf story should win you over. Jake is a freshman at Cornell University in Ithica, New York.

Hello, I am a freshman at Cornell, and I have had a problem with blocking in my speech for about six years. I read your article, and it really applied to me.

I am working with some counselors on campus right now to try and make some progress. When I am alone (as the case with many people) everything is fine, but the moment I have to talk to people, things get all tight, much like the isolated incident you were talking about when you were in San Francisco, except my incidents are not isolated. They are ongoing all day.

It is not very noticeable to other people, but it frustrates me. I look ahead to words that I am going to say, and when I do, I always stop before them. Something really interesting, though, is I had the SAME EXACT thing happen to my golf swing.

I started playing golf competitively at age 12, and I started to care about the result of each shot. I developed this habit of going up to the ball and setting up to it and not being able to pull the club back. It felt as though my arms were frozen and could not move at all.

Eventually the feeling would lessen, and I could just barely get the shot off, but I was not playing to my full potential.

Another interesting point is that when there was no ball there, I could take a swing without a block, which is sort of analogous to the fact that I can speak with no blocks when there are no people around.

The spring of my senior year in high school, I went out to the driving range and I said to myself, “Wow, this does not matter anymore,” because I knew I was not going to play golf in college. And those feelings just stopped immediately. I could now control my mind and choose what I wanted to think about.

I have not had that block happen in a full year now. That was pretty remarkable because for six years with my golf it happened on every single shot. I really think there is a link with that and my stuttering, and several psychologists have told me I have an obsessive-compulsive personality.

The comparisons to a golfer who has lost confidence in certain clubs or shots and a stutterer who has lost confidence in saying certain words is huge. Confidence is one of the core dynamics in recovering from stammering / stuttering.

This is the full article;

“What exactly is confidence, and why does it come and go seemingly for no apparent reason? Why is it that many golfers can hit the ball well or chip or putt well when they practice, but when they go out on the course, it falls apart?

 I believe confidence is a direct result of preparation and experience. Confidence is not some mystical belief that cannot be substantiated by tangible evidence. Confidence is knowing you can do something because you have done it before, or at least you have simulated doing it in practice enough times that you know you can do it again in a competition. Once a golfer has executed a shot successfully in competition, he then has a real and powerful experience to recall for future shot experience.

 “The Confidence Cycle” provides a great way to build confidence into your game. All successful golfers practice this way, whether structure in a formal approach or instinctive. The4re are four steps to the confidence cycle.

 Step 1: Technique

Many golfers practice technique exclusively. They are constantly working on positions, moves, pivots etc based on who is winning currently on the tour or the latest trend of swing style. However, good technique is an absolute if you are going to play golf with confidence consistently. So your technique must be attended to in every session.

 Technique by itself will give you some confidence out on the course, but what usually happens when you hit a few poor shots is that you then believe that it is your technique that is causing the poor shots. You then spend the rest of the round thinking about and working on your swing.

When you practice technique, evaluate your success or failure by whether you achieve the move or position in your swing and not where the ball goes.

Step 2: Skill

Once you have done some work on your technique, you should then practice skill. Skill is practicing a a particular shot repetitively. An example might be a 5-iron fade shot. After practicing your skill shots, your confidence level will be higher with that particular skill and you will play golf with a higher level of confidence.

Step 3: Test

Testing a shot involves focussing on a target and a goal and using your pre-shot routine on every shot. Many golfers avoid testing because they believe it can damage their confidence as it exposes their inability to hit shots when it comes. However, testing is vital in every practice session.

Examples of some basic and effective tests are three in a row test. Hit three shots in a row with a 5 iron through a ten yard gap. The first two might seem easy, but the third shot will feel much more like the pressure you feel out on the course. If you miss, start again and continue with this test until it is complete.

If you cannot complete a test after a few attempts, go back a step and practice the skill a few more times with no measurable pressure and then try the test again.

Step 4: Compete

After completing the three in a row tests you should be ready when you approach this shot on the course. Simply remind yourself that you have hit this shot three times in a row during practice, and you can certainly do it again.

Competing with confidence is the final hurdle to becoming a successful golfer. When you can successfully execute a shot on the course after taking yourself through the confidence cycle in your practice program, you will have achieved absolute confidence in that skill. Remember, confidence is a direct result of practice and preparation.“

Here is the link to the full article: http://www.mcguireprogramme.com/uploaded/files/golf_confidence.jpg

Read it? Understand the “confidence cycle”? If so, here is the comparison to stuttering / stammering:

“TECHNIQUE”

Like with golf technique, good speaking technique is very important. For us who stutter / stammer, technique is breath control, voice tone, and articulation. A golfer will go to the driving range to perfect and drill technique. We in mcgp read out loud, talk to other members or our family friends who understand what’s going on.

Like the driving range is the golfer’s comfort zone, the phonelist, courses and support groups are comfort zones for mcgp members. We use this to drill our technique.

Not really mentioned in the golf article is the importance of a coach or practice partner to give you feedback on your technique. Same with we who stutter. We need each other for that strict mutual coaching. Video cameras are great for this as well.

“SKILL”

Good golfers will use their good technique to produce different kinds of shots. High chips with backspin. Fades. Draws. Etc. Or simply making a reasonably good shot with good contact using a club that you’ve lost confidence in. This is called “skill”. A golfer will practice skill on the driving range, or a quite course where you can throw down two or three balls.

For we who stammer, skill is in things like ‘clarity’, ‘conciseness’, ‘assertiveness’.  Or simply saying a words with good technique without struggle or tricks. We develop skill by having conversations with other mcgp members, doing drills requiring memory and clarity, practicing ‘centring and clarifying’, practicing public speaking in support groups, etc.

To be continued … next: “testing” and “compete”

I just found your posting regarding golf – it was last Thursday. I introduced my use of Golf in 2001 at either Swindon or Bristol and it takes the form of an interview between a well know golf pro and a golf commentator;

Commentator: – Well Tiger, why do people refer to you as the luckiest golfer?

Tiger: – What do you mean, Barry?

Commentator: – Well, every time you find yourself in the ‘rrrrrough’ you put yourself back on the fairway with just a simple shot. You pause – - – to assess the situation and decide which club or iron to use, you swing a few p p p p practise shots (block release) then with your eye on the ball, draw the club right back and assertively hit the ball and follow through (eye contact, long hit and hold, and assertive first sound and keep moving forward, no holding back) and each time your ball lands back in the middle of the fairway. The same thing happens when you land in a bunker, you pause – assess the situation, choose a wedge, swing a few p p p p practice shots (block release) then with your eye on the ball you draw the club back and assertively but controlled you hit the ball with follow through (eye contract short hit and hold, keep moving forward, no holding back), your ball lands on the green next to the pin/hole. That’s what I mean. It always looks so easy for you, no matter what difficulty you have it doesn’t seem to worry you. You just take your time to put it right. You must feel very lucky.

Tiger: – Well, I must think about this (pause – resist time pressure) Well Barry, all I can say is this, the more I practise luckier I seem to get. A club could be used to demonstrate the various points.

Regards,

Geoffrey Liddington

You’re right about “practicing” at work. Just like going out on course with your serious golfing friends is not the best time to practice you swing by throwing down an extra ball or two. Again, in golf, you prepare and practice for the ’serious’ rounds on the driving range and/or going out alone on a quiet, uncrowded course. Work is your ’serious’ speaking round for which you must practice in easier situations that have no consequences.

Having said this, in a serious round of golf where you start playing poorly and have no chance of a decent score/winning, the best thing to do is look at it as a ‘practice round’ and forget about the score. At work, if your stammering / stuttering has overwhelmed you and your fluency is falling apart, what are your choices? You can either continue to struggle for ‘fluency’ with tricks and avoidances, but we all know this only makes it worse, or, you can do an attitude re-adjustment and use it to practice those tools, if you have tools, that will lead to better performance/speech.

In our programme, we encourage each other to make a ‘disclosure’ saying something like: “boy my speech is really falling apart today, I’m going to have to concentrate on some things to get it back. just bear with me.” Most times the colleagues are very supportive and understanding and appreciate something being said (rather than you/us continuing to try to hide the problem). If you get ridiculed, it’s time to take a good look if this is a job you would want to keep as such disrespect/lack of support is probably not limited to your speech.

Another thing about practicing is what I said about “feared word/sound” = “feared club”. Just like you have to hit maybe hundreds of balls at the driving range to gain confidence in a club that has let you down, you have to make many many contacts (phone and street) using the word or sound that caused you to block/avoid or use tricks in order to regain confidence. and this will carry over to the work-place to improve your speaking performance.

Dave McGuire

The driving range and calls to supportive friends/practice contacts. 

Let’s start with golf.

Interesting how the psychological stress of a difficult course or challenging opponent manifests itself in ‘hitches’ to swings. Pro players after walking 18 holes in a tournament will go right to the driving range to “re-groove” their swings especially those that fell apart on the course. You see this with professional tennis players even after a 4 hour clay court match who go directly to the practice courts to correct those strokes that lost them points.

“Directly” because bad habits tend to put down roots if you don’t take care of them right away.

Okay, after 18 holes, I’m not in the mood, as a beginning amateur, to go right to the driving range. I’d prefer a gin and tonic and good dinner . But were I a professional, where my livelihood depended on how well I play, you better believe I’d get to the driving range after my round. As a (fairly serious) beginner, I’ll go to the driving range the next day. (There’s a serious analogy to this ‘beginner/pro’ stuff later.)

Starting with my easiest club, usually a pitching wedge, I’ll go back to basics, even breaking my swing down to three phases, until I can hit at least 5 in a row where I want with good, clean contact. Then I’ll go to the next easiest club, gain my confidence, then end up with those clubs that gave me the most trouble the day before on the course.

I will hit many more balls with my ‘challenging’ clubs than with the others. Sometimes I can get my confidence back that same session, but usually I’ll have to go back the next day and possibly the day after to totally regain confidence (at least on the driving range). Going back on a course before confidence is gained on the driving range is usually (but not always) productive.

And now to stuttering / stammering:

Call your supportive friends (for people in the McGuire Programme, use the phonelist and coaches) asap.

First an important point: Mentioned above, professional golfers will get to the driving range/putting green immediately. Amateurs usually don’t go immediately. We who stammer / stutter need to play this sport on the professional level … after-all, our livelihood depends or will depend to a great extent on how well we can verbally communicate. Therefore, we need to get to the equivalent of a driving range (phone calls and contacts) right away. Procrastinating until it is convenient or you’re not so tired is for amateurs.

Starting with those words you still have confidence in that didn’t fall apart in the pressure situation, use them in short sentences while exaggerating the speaking technique you know will lead to improvement. (In the McGuire programme this means pause, take a full costal breath, speak with deep and breathy resonance, and fully release residual air, practicing also hit and holds and block release.) Very effective is to use a lot of voluntary stammering (which we call ‘deliberate dysfluency’) on these less challenging words.

Move from the easiest words to the ones that gave you the most trouble and have becomed feared. 

 Now move up the stairway of feared situations. Starting with your support network, get these to the place where there is such an absence of fear that saying these once panic-striken words is so easy, it’s boring. 

Like with getting your swing back on the driving range, this might take a couple of days/sessions. But do it. As you repeadly experience that you can indeed regain your confidence, both with feared clubs and feared words, it will take less time on the driving range/ making contacts, to get it back.

Dave McGuire