It was during my final year presentation in college that I really understood the crippling effect my stuttering had on me. A pounding heart, sweaty palms and words that just would not come out. The fear, shame and guilt were something that broke me. I felt marginalised and alone in the world and vowed to avoid presentations or any forms of public speeches in the future.
The next big challenge came during my wedding when I had to reply to the toast. I somehow managed to scrape through it as fast as I could with a lot of bumbling in between. When my wife and I decided to have kids, all I could think of is, ‘Let’s choose some easy names so that I can say them’, and ‘How will I be able to read bedtime stories to my children?’.
I did my first McGuire course in June 2018 in India.
To say my life has changed after that would be a gross understatement. This program has given me my life back. No more backing away from challenges (be it speaking or otherwise).
One of the best lessons this program has taught me is honesty and courage. To be able to show others that I am a stutterer and not be ashamed or apologetic about it. It is this honesty and courage that has given me control over my speech.
Now I look forward to presentations and public speeches and am able to control my fear and not let it cripple or get the better of me. I face the world with newfound strength and self-confidence that I never dreamed possible in the past.
Not only do I read, but most of the time come up with my own bedtime stories for my kids which they love listening to. “Dada’s stories are so funny”, said my little daughter, words that I will cherish for life.
Words are not enough to thank my family, friends and everyone on this program. It is with your help and support that I have come so far. Hand in hand we will walk on this journey together. Never alone again.
Jason D’Souza
SINGAPORE
